Tuesday, May 29, 2007

Three-Day Weekend Report! New Recurring Feature!

Welcome back! For my readers in the U.S. I hope you had a lovely Memorial Day weekend. For my international following, I hope you had a lovely weekend as well.

You may recall that last Monday I wrote all about my weekend in perilous detail. Well I'm going to do that again now, and in fact I have decided to make this a regular feature. Every Monday (or Tuesday if Monday is a Federally mandated holiday) I will write about my weekend. I think it's better for us this way.

This is me at the beginning of the weekend:

This is me now:

I'll explain later.

Thursday Night
-Watched the Season Finale of Lost, again. Jack has a beard!!! They have to go back!!!
-Went to Dee's with Terrence Rex and Cherie the Schoolteacher. I ate breakfast at night. Can you even believe it?
-Watched Scorsese's masterpiece Raging Bull, which I had never seen. Black and white photography has never looked so good. Amazing movie. I can't believe it lost the Best Picture Oscar to Friday the 13th.

(note: I just realized that my weekend actually started Friday night, not Thursday night. Oh well. Consider it a bonus.)

Friday Night
-Got home from work, napped on the couch for two and half hours.
-Woke up refreshed, bored, and in the mood for a snack.
-Went to the House of Barlow where Cherie the Schoolteacher shared from the enormous supply of candy given to her by her students.
-Watched MTV's Scarred. Have you seen this show? Why why why why why why why is it on the air? Why did I watch it? Here's what it is: home-made footage of skateboarders and other Mountain Dew types suffering grievous injuries. It's not like Jackass where they're trying to hurt themselves, it's more like "Dude check it out I'm totally gonna jump over OH NO MY FOOT'S ON BACKWARDS!" Bottom line: arms should not be shaped like lightning bolts, when standing upright the sole of one foot should not point skyward, and your testicles should always remain on the *ahem* inside.

-slept in way too late. Puttered about for a while. Straightened up the homefront.
-Went to Jiffy Lube to get my oil changed. This took literally half a second.
-Wasted an hour wandering around Barnes n' Noble, did not find what I was looking for.
-I did see a book that looked interesting but I wanted to read the reviews on Amazon before buying it. Now I can't remember what it was called or who wrote it or what it was about.
-Headed Downtown to go the Gateway Mall, an hour before the Big Game was to start. If you live in SLC you know that this was a bad idea. For those that don't, the Gateway Mall is across from the Sporting Arena, in an area where parking is minimal and construction is rampant. I realized too late that I was never going to be able to find parking unless I wanted to pay $10. Traffic was so bad it took another half-hour just to get out of the area.
-Had some folks over to watch the Game. Home Team was losing until I realized that I was accidentally wearing the colors of Enemy Team, so I quickly changed and then Home Team ended up winning. Go Jazz.
-A French girl drank my Gatorade.
-Made the best cup of coffee in the world. I also make the best burgers and the best frosted cookies in the world. Just sayin'.
-Due to space limitations the rest of the evening's events will be omitted.

-Remember a few weeks ago when my computer got all busted? I finally got a new one. Yes, the reason I tried to go the Gateway Mall on Saturday and the reason I switched from Nerdy Guy to Cool Guy is because I have purchased a Mac. I am typing this up on a Macbook right now. I love it. It's so white and pure. I feel like I'm in the "club" now. In fact as soon as I took it out of the box electronifunkfolk rocker Beck called me up to congratulate me.
-Southern Soul Food Feast hosted by Terrence Rex. Best fried catfish I have ever had. And I've had a lot of fried catfish in my day (true story).
-My friend Em and I were feeling anti-social during the feast so we ended up inside watching Scrubs and drinking Guinness. Dr. Cox is so mean to JD all the time.
-Messed around with my computer.

-In honor of Memorial Day I sat around and messed around with my computer. I was disappointed by the lack of Baseball on my TV.
-Accidentally watched That Thing You Do. Pretty good.
-Went to the Big Game (part 4). Sat on the very last row. The Jazz lost. Afterward I saw a man crying.
-While I was walking from my car to the arena I passed a girl on the street who said "Nice blog." This is 100% true. She probably recognized me because I was wearing my Mets hat. Also I was sipping a fruity drink through a straw and carrying a turtle.
-During the game I saw a Marine in full dress uniform gingerly carrying two beers and trying not to spill. Later I saw him clapping two Thunder Stix together (Dear Australians: Thunder Stix are these inflatable balloon tube things that sound like a snare drum when banged together. They're very popular at sporting events. Maybe you have them over there too and now I just look like an idiot). Anyway, seeing the Marine just acting like a regular guy kind of made me sad. I'm not going to make a big "Support Our Troops" thing out of this but you really gotta hand it to those guys.
-Maybe someday I'll tell you about the time I snuck into Parris Island (that's where they train the Marines).
-Back home, messing around with my computer.

Oh, and now that I have a Mac you can expect to see a lot more pictures of me, like this:


  1. Wow that was some weekend, no wonder your after pic looks so relaxed - thanks for the thunder stix lowdown. I think we have something similar though I'm not sure what they are called (just checked with Mr Brown, he doesn't know either).

  2. Thank you for the first out-loud laugh of this abbreviated week, which came courtesy of this line: "In fact as soon as I took it out of the box electronifunkfolk rocker Beck called me up to congratulate me."

    Also, congratulations on the new computer. She's lovely.

  3. Go Spurs!!! I'm sorry that you were at the game that they lost...but I wish you guys luck next year.

  4. Your spreadsheets now are going to totally SUCK!

  5. Wow, that's quite the weekend.

    Someone actually said,"nice blog?"
    Seriously? That needs its own post alone.