Wednesday, May 13, 2009

Days of Thunder part 1: of Muds and Salts

This song tells you everything you need to know.

But not yet.

There are some things a man does that he can never forgive himself for. Like last year on May 10th when I slept in and missed Lee's birthday brunch and thusly missed out on an impromptu trip to my favorite ghosty town, Eureka. That was the first of what will hopefully be many Lee's Birthday Adventures, and I'll be damned if I was going to miss the second.

Westward bound, Interstate 80, the most unforgiving Interstate in the whole system. It's here, past the Ruins, that I cross into parts unknown, the furthest west I've ever been on the 80.

It's a hearty crew. Lee and Lisa, the Couple Horton, Nathaniel of Seattle, and Scotty, Resident Geologist and Wearer of Fancy Hats. As we stabbed westward the Great Salt Lake faded away and we found ourselves driving through the ghosts of Lake Bonneville.

On either side of the road are these vast beds of strange clay-like mud. Looks solid but it's actually all squishy. People have written messages in the mud with black rocks or upside-down beer bottles. We figured it would be pretty foolish to drive past and not vandalize the wilderness so we pulled over and took a look around.

I told you this stuff was squishy. Also, notice that there is only one set of footprints.

It was bright and the mud was freaking us out so we opted against leaving our own rock message. And we couldn't think of anything good to write except for maybe the word "boner." I hastily assembled this B and we were on our way.

Do you like blinding white light and incomprehensible vastness? Then the Bonneville Salt Flats are for you!

Scott, being a man of the dirt, paused to take it all in.

I asked him to explain the geologic properties of the Salt Flats but I didn't like his answer so I dropped him.

Nathaniel is like "too bright!" and Lisa is all "What's the big deal?" (cause sunglasses). Meanwhile Lee captures the moment.

The Bonneville Salt Flats are where crazy people with crazy rocket cars go to set land speed records. I wanted to drive out on them but wasn't sure if the salt would ruin my car. I don't know much about cars. Or salt.

Since I didn't want to drive on it, I decided to set a new land speed record on foot!

Once that was done though it was a long agonizing walk back to the car.

Mysterious Interloper: "See that mountain out there that looks like it's floating? It's actually 22 miles away."

Scott: "But it is floating, right?"

Mysterious Interloper: "No."

We're only one-third of the way done. Next time, a border incursion into the sinful pocket of West Wendover, Nevada.


  1. Well done, and we haven't even gotten to the fun part yet!

  2. Happy Birthday to B!

  3. So were you able to verify that the mountain was in fact 22 miles away. Because that guy could have just been shitting ya.

  4. Hey, Bonneville Salt Flats is such a nice place, right? I used to work pretty near from it and every time I had the chance, I loved going there. It's a great spot for pictures!

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